Losing a pregnancy is hard. You may feel shocked, isolated, in the depths of grief.
I remember thinking, "This is the kind of thing that happens to other people, not me."
"How could this have happened?"
"Did I do something wrong?"
"What did I do to deserve this?"
I've asked myself all these questions before. I feel you, friend.
It's so hard to reconcile the pain you're feeling with the joy you experienced so recently. How can these two things exist so closely in time? Why you? It's not fair.
You don't have to struggle like this.
What if you could walk this path with a community of women who have gotten through it?
This journal is my 7-step process for helping you feel understood, heard, validated. Through our private online community, you'll find your people. You'll come to understand that you're not alone and there is a way forward.
You're now part of a sisterhood that none of us wants to be part of, but we're all here to support you.
Ready to feel supported, understood, like you can slowly walk through each day until light enters your world again?
“This journal has been so helpful as I work through the grief that comes with pregnancy loss. I find myself returning to it even months after my loss. The online community is an amazing bonus! It has been a safe place for me to share my feelings and talk with others who understand what I’m going through.”
When I experienced four miscarriages in a year-and-a-half, I felt lost, hopeless, alone, with nowhere to turn. I wanted to feel understood and hope that somehow, some way, some day, I would be able to move forward.
This journal is your handheld guide to moving forward through the arduous experience of miscarriage grief.
No matter the length of your pregnancy, your loss matters. Your grief is valid.
Not a traditional prompt-and-fill-in-the-space journal, this immersive, guided experience validates your emotions, meets you where you are, and supports you through your journey.
Because this is a journey. Your journey. You get to walk it at your own pace, in your own way. I’ll hold your hand along the way.
I will help you process your emotions and work through practical decisions as you learn to live with this new normal. Mourning Retreat will help you find yourself again, in your time, as you’re ready.
Choose the version of Mourning Retreat that best fits your needs.
E-Journal with access to private online community
Print journal with access to private online community
Full support with a copy of the E-Journal and print journal, access to the private online community, 15 days of email support sent directly to your inbox, and 3 months of unlimited text message support with Katy, the author of Mourning Retreat
“My heart didn’t hurt as much as I thought it would, and that’s honestly because of Katy.”
I’m a recurrent pregnancy loss mama. After a year-and-a-half of infertility, I lost 4 pregnancies before finally birthing my son, Jack. Through that time, I underwent extensive therapy both for grief and anxiety, and I learned so much about myself, moving forward through grief, and creating helpful (not obsessive) plans of action.
I also have a PhD in English Literature. When researching Victorian motherhood, I was stunned to see how little we’ve progressed in the last two centuries in the ways we talk about women’s bodies and experiences.
The importance of this problem really hit home when I went through the lived experience of recurrent miscarriage—when everyone had things to say, and almost all of it hurt more than it helped.
Ultimately, I left my teaching job at Georgia Tech to pursue writing full time.
My passion is helping women through difficult times like these, using the tools I learned along my journey to make everyone else's a little bit easier.
Mourning Retreat: A Journal for the Sisterhood of Pregnancy Loss is a 107-page guided journal.
It combines methods from Katy's
extensive time in therapy
with concrete approaches to processing your grief, you'll find journal pages, worksheets, checklists, creative exercises, and more.
Katy discussing miscarriage on CNN's Headline News
Q: Do I have to go in order, or can I jump around?
This journal is yours to do what you want with. It’s set-up in a way that guides you through different process and emotions in a logical order, but all of our experiences look different. So, while I suggest going through the journal in order, you may choose not to. If there are parts that don’t speak to your situation or that you find distressing, opt to those skip sections. This is yours to be used in a way that helps you.
Q: Do I have to print the E-Journal?
The E-Journal is editable, so it’s designed to be used on your computer. That said, some people may choose to print it. It is long, so if you print it, I suggest printing in black-and-white to save ink, and making sure you want all the pages before you print them.
If you aren't shy about your experience, it's beautiful when printed and bound somewhere like FedEx Office.
Q: How does on editable E-Journal work?
Everywhere you need write or draw gives you that ability. Simply click the space where you want to write or draw, and a text box or drawing box should pop up. If it doesn’t, and you’re working in Adobe, you can also click “Tools-->Annotate” to open a new textbox or drawing box.
It is editable on a phone or tablet, but due to the size, it's easiest to use on a tablet or computer.
Q: How much time will it take me to complete the journal?
It depends on how you use it. Ideally, you’ll use the journal over time, dedicating a few minutes each day. Some people will dive right in and finish it within hours. Others will take weeks. Go at your own pace and do what works for you.
Q: Where should I use the journal?
Make sure you’re in a space that’s comfortable for experiencing your emotions. Not all parts of the journal will evoke a strong emotional response, but some might.
I recommend somewhere comforting--your bed, couch, or in a hot bath. (Obviously, don’t put your computer or the paper pages in the tub!)
Q: Can I purchase this as a gift for someone else?
Absolutely! If you are purchasing as a gift, we highly recommend purchasing a print copy of the journal. If you choose to purchase the e-journal or full support bundle as a gift, please use the recipient's email address so they can receive full access immediately. You'll need to tell them you sent the gift, as we don't currently have the capabilities of giving them a message from you.
Q: When will my journal ship?
Your journal will ship within 2 business days of purchase (though we do our best to ship same-day or the following day.) You can select a shipping option at checkout to determine how quickly your journal will arrive.
Q: Can I return my journal?
Due to the nature of this product, we do not accept returns. That said, if you are in any way dissatisfied with your purchase, please let us know by email so we can do all in our power to support you in the way you need.
“The online community has become a place where I feel safe. Losing three babies, I felt more alone than I ever have and it was nice knowing that I wasn’t. I wouldn’t have made it through these past couple of years without this community.”